Erica Jong said, “If you don’t risk anything, you risk more”.

Not to decide is to decide. Everyday we make decisions that affect our lives. The willingness to fall in love is one of them. It was 2am when Amy was woken by the sound of her phone receiving a text . It was Matt the guy who finally had come to her that was not a jerk. Sure he had some tenancies of being a bit obnoxious at times but he was perfect in her eyes. Even though she was tired her face beamed with happiness at the sight of his name. He was everything she dreamed of. He was smart, athletic ,the sweetest , supportive beyond belief a tad on the short side but hot as hell and most importantly he made her laugh ; he made her feel safe.Just the way he would hug her and never want to let go . What could go wrong?Adjusting her eyes to brightness of the screen she read the very words that brought tears to her eyes "Guess what ? I wanted you to be the first to know I got in! I'm going to England for six months!"Amy at this time was a grade 12 student with a clear vision of what she wanted for her future and going to university in September was one of them. She replied " That's so awesome congratulations !When do you leave?" A month was the reply. She tried not to think about the fact that this could really be goodbye .England was really far away and she would most likely be gone to school by the time of his return .The rest of the night was blurred with tears as the pieces of her life felt like they were crumbling down. Over the next few weeks Amy and Matt acted as if their time had no limit.But Amy could sense some hesitancy in his actions,he was holding back .She feared making this work but she feared losing him even more.By the time the day arrived for Matt's departure She had made her decision .The choice to let him go.From that very moment Amy was trying to keep it together but she was falling apart up until the moment he drove away for what would be the last time. When it comes to life and love you have to decide whats worth the risk? And if falling in love is one worth taking?

we dont always have a happy ending...

Engulfed in a sea of sheets I woke up with a sudden jolt. The clock beside me on the chestnut bureau flashed 6:32 am .I was already off to a late start to further pursue the arrangements I had made for the day .My first stop was to meet Amy at our local Starbucks to portray a sense of regularity in her eyes, so nothing would seem out of place until the peak of surprise was unveiled .As I was watching in admiration I listened to the soft voice of a girl too pretty for me. She was mine. Mine all mine what did I do to deserve her? What did she see in my decor? I was just a homely man who consisted of scraggly brown hair paired with a leather jacket that had been worn too many times to count. Underneath I showed off the new ,already dirty pullover that my brother gave me for my birthday just two weeks previous. I was lucky and I knew that. As elementary as it was, simple was my style. It also I guess was an adjective that came to govern my life. I was okay with that though .I liked who I was and how my life was turning out. After all if my luck continued tonight would change my life for the better. We had been dating for two years the first time I decided I wanted Amy to be my wife. Now we had been trudging along through the story we called our lives for the past six years. This time I would follow through with it, I wouldn't let my fear get the best of me. Several hours later the sun was setting, outlined with a glimmer of pink encompassed by a streamline radiating like the sun .The reservations were made. My suit dry cleaned. Everything was in place for the big night. I climbed the dusty jagged staircase which the first time I saw it I thought it would lead to my death. As I clenched my knuckles to form just about to knock on the wood panel called the door. I heard a whisper; it was coming from around the corner .What I was about to see would bruise my heart forever , there she was, Amy in all of her beauty was kissing Him .The next few weeks were a blur but would always serve as a reminder that we don't always get our happy endings.

Education in the 20th Century

Education has being the basis and foundation of peoples lives for over hundreds of years .But is that really our true purpose to go to school day after day being swept away in the abundance amounts of boredom that comes from siting in a mahogany desk and listening to a teacher blab on and on for countless hours .For the last 13 years of school was it worth it? Or a pointless way to spread our time preparing for the outside world we call it . Well that is the question that is posed. In my opinion it goes both ways to a certain extent I can say with conviction that a lot of the things I had to endure in high school, in particular were quite pointless to my education and to my life . I don't feel as someone out of high school I will care or even remember math calculation's which I was taught were so important to my future. Such as trigonometry and quadratics. It has been said that math is a numbers game but where has all the numbers gone? Letters are more and more rapidly integrating themselves further and further in .Causing an uproar in the brains of new comers striving to reach their peak . But I ask you what is truly important ? Is it countless equations we learn in math or chemistry or is it the communication skills we learn in English or the arts . Social skills and how we value communication with either elevate us or crush us when we are set free to our own resources.When we leave this place will you be ready ? Or will you be left waiting in the wings wanting someone to save you from the jungle that is our world. Our workplace. School has taught us that we need to follow a cookie cutter equation and if we do we will succeed. Starting with studying for a test students; they are brainwashed into the routine study for the test . Get a good mark .Repeat until course is over , then continue with all other courses . We strive for this to get into good schools to pursue our dreams . Sadly that is only part of the spectrum that can handle this the other half give up and just let themselves slip through the cracks of life . What is our education system doing ? Who knows who and what we could be missing out on . One of those students has the potential the change the world but we didn't give them a chance because they didn't fit into the perfectly outlined box we put them in . Myself almost out of high school I do feel a certain amount of preparedness however I do not award the praise to our schools I award that to specific teachers that had a "different" way of thinking and getting involved in activities outside of the school environment prompting me to have wide eyes to the world I will be leaping into so soon in June . If I could change the system for future generations and create the perfect school society. It would consist of structure yes but a great deal more of opportunities to be creative and to have an open mind . To grow and to discover who we are and who we were went to me . As September approaches I find myself letting go of what could of been and striving to pursue my dreams . Next I want to go to post secondary and start my BA in psychology starting me on the road to understanding, a path not many want to travel to help the weak and the broken .If in twenties years I've made even the smallest difference I'll know I've done my job well.

If I had one wish

Soaring past the stars that twinkled from the smiles of angels. The seams of my birthday dress clung to my sides .I was at peace. As I passed over the lights of the city I had a new sense of understanding. This world we live in is a complex whirlwind of countless disasters, that provide the glimmer of hope we call happiness. It can be short lived or if we're lucky last a lifetime. This is the kind of thoughts that leaped across the canvas of my mind. As I flew in the air reaching for the wonders of existence my eyes wandered to a mother alone after hearing the very words "he's not coming come”, the agony and heartbreak were displayed in her eyes. A tear trickled down my cheek like the candle to the fire. Ripped from the scene I saw a little girl about my age sitting in the grayness of the dirt crouched over a puddle of contaminated water. This would be her fix for the day ,maybe the week. She was fragile, covered with a skin so translucent. A flash and she was gone. I was now surrounded again only by the twinkling stars hanging in the horizon. As the blinding sun crept in past the sturdy panes my eyes were pulled back into reality, enclosed by the whirlwind of my lime green sheets I sat up in my bed. I had seen the broken. I had seen the hungry. I was so lucky to live in this place I call home. That night I blew out the candles on my birthday cake and whispered "If I had one wish it would be to fly, to fly across the world like I did in my dreams so I could protect the broken and the hungry." Now ten years later I am just about to graduate high school and am on my way, hoping to make the wish of an eight year old little girl come true.